Partners, In Work And Play
by Compelled
Summary: Zim and Dib hafta take care of a robotic baby doll for a school assignment. Zim gets a genius idea. ZaDR -and some DaGr?-
1. Chapter 1

"In an effort to keep you... students from reproducing, I will be assigning you partners for a new project. You will take care of a baby together." Mrs. Bitter's looked throughly disgusted. Collective groans came from the class.

"The partners are as followed; Keef and Zita, Keef you will be a stay at home father, Sara and Torque, teenage parents, Mary and Melvin both working parents, Gretchen and Chunk as a divorced couple, Zim and Dib as our 'expirmental' couple who adopted-"

"What?!?" "I will not raise Dib's large headed smeetie!" Both Zim and Dib yelled at the teacher over the giggles and comments.

"Silence! If you have a problem you can go to the principle." Zim and Dib quieted down, Zim with an obvious pout, niether listening as Ms. Bitters continued. "Good. Now, the babies have a mechanical system to measure abuse, and whether or not you are taking good care of the child. Now get out." The bell rang as Ms. Bitters stood by the door, passing out plain looking bald baby dolls to each couple. Zim held the thing far away with a sneer, tossing it aside. Dib scrambled to catch the doll, holding it close.

"Zim! Be careful, I don't wanna fail." Dib held the doll as one would a real baby, glaring over at the alien. He snorted as Zim took a deep breath, knowing what was coming.

"Stupid, foolish human! Does the Dib-Beast actually care for this.... robot smeetie. It disfunctions more than GIR, for it does nothing!" Zim began laughing maniacly, then stopped as Dib opened his mouth again.

"It's a doll Zim! We're it's 'parents' we have to-" Zim smirked and turning slowly toward Dib. He gently pulled the doll from Dib's arms, stroking it's cheek.

"Zim sees, Dib-stink. I understand. You want to have a baby with the almighty Zim! It is a good thing it has my genes, and not yours. It would have a large head, I assume." Dib turned red, and his left eye twitched lightly.

"Whatever Zim. Do you want to take it home with you tonight?" Dib asked, but looked up to realize that the alien had already walked away.

~

"Oh, partner-in-both-meanings-of-the-world, it is your turn to watch the offspring we produced?" Dib sighed and turned to where Zim was yelling, then noticed that many girls were pointing and 'aw'ing at him.

"Zim- What. Is. That!" He asked through clenched teeth.

"Why, it is our lovely Dibette. Our female smeetie. Isn't she cute?" Zim smirked, holding out the doll.

It now had light green skin, slightly paler than Zim, a painted dusting of black hair, and Dib's hazel eyes. She was wearing a tiny Irken outfit with little blue smiley face- tongue out- that reminded the human of GIR.

"Ohmygod. For the love of all things Mysterious." Dib muttered, flabbergasted.

"I am suprised, Dib, that we actually had quite acceptable human-smeeties. According to my computer they would be extremely smart and diligent, good runners, but would be loud, demanding, and eccentric. Not that those are bad things." Zim rambled on for a moment, and Dib held the doll in his arms, eyes widening at the way that he noticed Zim was staring almost... lovingly at it. "Our smeeties could rule this miserable planet. Yes, Dib. We must MATE!" The last word Zim screeched caused Dib tojump and blush.

"No, Zim. I- we can't- no. Mate? Do you know what that wou- it's not- no-but I, what are you-? I don't want to take over Earth." Dib finished lamely, as Zim smirked down at him.

"But you do want to mate with Zim, don't you?" Dib sighed, knowing that he had no way out of this.

"She, Dibette did you say? Is rather cute..." Dib replied relucantly, and Zim scooted closer to him, leaning his head on Dib's shoulder.

"Yes... she has your eyes." Zim stated, glancing up at the blushing human. Dib chuckled lightly.

"Why Dibette?" Dib asked, locking eyes with the alien.

"Don't worry, Dib. Our son will be Zim Jr." Zim stated, touching the dolls head.

"Yeah, I like tha-" Dib agreed lightly, then stopped himself. "We don't have a son, Zim."

"Not yet." The alien's answer came from behind Dib, and Zim hooked a leg around Dib's waist. Dib clutched the baby closer and tensed. "MATE ME, DIB!"

Zim's outburst caused many students to turn and glare at the couple, and suddenly Mrs. Bitters swooped down and snatched the doll from Dib.

"Clearly, this has gone to your small underdevolped brain, Zim! You both... pass." Mrs. Bitter's shuddered lightly, and glanced at Dib.

"She has your eyes." She stated, then left. Dib stood blinking, half forgetting the alien suggestivly hooked around his waist; until, that is, the aforemention huffed 'mate with me, Dib' in his ear. 


	2. Edited Version of Chapter 2

The Dib-Human was giving in. Zim could feel it in his squeedly-spooch. The more he asked, smirked and told other people, the more he could feel Dib giving in.

"Dib-Mate!" Zim called out across the lunch room to the black haired boy who blush and snarled, walking toward Zim.

"You. Hallway. Now!" Dib growled, slamming Zim agaisnt a row of lockers, and narrowed his eyes. Zim simply smiled gleefully.

"I knew you would give into Zim! Our smeeties will take over this fffffilthy ball of... filth! Pretty cute too..." Zim an a finger over Dib cheek, and Dib sputtered in responce. Zim blinked a few time, then pouted.

"I have studied the human mating rituals. This is the part when you kiss Zim." Zim puckered his lips, waiting. Dib stared at them, trying to fight off both a blush and the wanting to snuggle into Zim's pale green neck. Zim huffed, and his actually pretty cool breath blew across Dib's face. He was taken off gaurd when Zim leaned in, nuzzling the space where he should've had a nose into Dib's nose, thier lips not quite touching. Zim's arms reached inside Dib's coat, three talons scratching circles into Dib's spine. Shivers racked Dib's body, making him curl toward the alien.

"I-If you studied up on human dati-mating then you realize that we can't have kids right? Or can-" Zim laughed lightly, sarcastically.

"Irken's are raised by robots, and in order to get our smeetie the computer only needs your DNA, as it already has mine." Zim replied sarcastically, pinching Dib lightly at the assumption he was 'female'.

"Then couldn't you just take my DNA?" Dib stuttered, holding Zim's head and rubbing the pads of his fingers up and down the sides of his head.

"And raise our smeeties by myself in a disfunctional home? Besides, you obviously want to mate with the almightly Zim." Zim smirked, pressing himself closer to Dib.

"Won't our home be disfunctional anyway?" Dib gasped defeated, fisting his hands agaisnt the lockers, his wrists touching Zim's waist.

"Victory for Zim!" The cry was soft, muttered agaisnt Dib's chest, and he held the other boy close. They stood in an embrace for a moment, before Dib swooped his head down, gently pressing his lips to Zim's.

"Let's go..." Both boys muttered at the same time, grinning lazily.

The walk to Zim's house was suprisingly comfortable. They held hands on the walk, which felt amazing in Dib's hand. So small, and soft. His three fingers fit between Dib's pinky, ring, and middle finger, allowing his thumb to hold and softly stroke all of Zim's hand. Zim goose-stepped up the walkway, flinging open the door to reveal Gir with his hood flipped down. He was holding half knitted baby booties and rolls of yarn strung throught the house.  
"Bigheadededededed Boy! Do you need anything, Mistress?" GIR cried happily, attaching himself to the shocked Dib's leg, the glaring up at him with Duty Mode red eyes.

"Err, no... and you can just call me Dib, GIR." Dib stated, patting the little robot on the head.

"Okie Dokie!" GIR grinned happily.

"Urgh!" ZIm had become tangled in light yellow yarn, causing both Dib and GIR to giggle.

"Awww, it likes youuuu." He sang, and Din crotched down to untangle the strings from around Zim's leg.

"Thank you." Zim mumbled quietly, leaning down. GIR body slammed into Zim's ass, forcing him to fall onto Dib and knock them onto the area rug. GIR squealed and skipped off, muttering things about 'pretty smelly paint' and 'nursery'. Dib grinned lightly, wrapping his arms around Zim's waist, and kissing him lightly.

"Computer! Take us to my room." Zim commanded.

Dib awoke to a light pressure on his chest. He looked to his left and took the glasses his boyfriend were offering him, noticing that his neck was wet and throbbing. Zim must've been trying to wake him up by assulting his neck... explains the hard on. He then noticed that Zim was biting on a knuckle, holding in laughter. It was then Dib remembered the weight on his chest. He looked down to see the back of Gir, who quickly turned his head.  
"Eh, Dibbeh... is your weewee broken? 'Cause its all bent funny, and if I pokes it, it wiggles like a gettin' burnt wormy in the sun." The robots eyes were wide, and Dib blushes a scarlet that countered Zim's eyes. "Uhm, well you see Gir... I uh... I'd really, really, like some waffles." Gir shot to his stubby little feet, and ran off.  
"I LOVE WAFFLES!" He shouted, giggling. Zim removed his knuckle, holding back his laughter with a bad case of the shakes.  
"Need me to fix your pee-pee, Dibbles?" He asked slyly,'causing Dib to groan and flop back agaisnt the bed. 


	3. Dirty Version of Chapter 2

The Dib-Human was giving in. Zim could feel it in his squeedly-spooch. The more he asked, smirked and told other people, the more he could feel Dib giving in.

"Dib-Mate!" Zim called out across the lunch room to the black haired boy who blush and snarled, walking toward Zim.

"You. Hallway. Now!" Dib growled, slamming Zim agaisnt a row of lockers, and narrowed his eyes. Zim simply smiled gleefully.

"I knew you would give into Zim! Our smeeties will take over this fffffilthy ball of... filth! Pretty cute too..." Zim an a finger over Dib cheek, and Dib sputtered in responce. Zim blinked a few time, then pouted.

"I have studied the human mating rituals. This is the part when you kiss Zim." Zim puckered his lips, waiting. Dib stared at them, trying to fight off both a blush and the wanting to snuggle into Zim's pale green neck. Zim huffed, and his actually pretty cool breath blew across Dib's face. He was taken off gaurd when Zim leaned in, nuzzling the space where he should've had a nose into Dib's nose, thier lips not quite touching. Zim's arms reached inside Dib's coat, three talons scratching circles into Dib's spine. Shivers racked Dib's body, making him curl toward the alien.

"I-If you studied up on human dati-mating then you realize that we can't have kids right? Or can-" Zim laughed lightly, sarcastically.

"Irken's are raised by robots, and in order to get our smeetie the computer only needs your DNA, as it already has mine." Zim replied sarcastically, pinching Dib lightly at the assumption he was 'female'.

"Then couldn't you just take my DNA?" Dib stuttered, holding Zim's head and rubbing the pads of his fingers up and down the sides of his head.

"And raise our smeeties by myself in a disfunctional home? Besides, you obviously want to mate with the almightly Zim." Zim smirked, pressing himself closer to Dib.

"Won't our home be disfunctional anyway?" Dib gasped defeated, fisting his hands agaisnt the lockers, his wrists touching Zim's waist.

"Victory for Zim!" The cry was soft, muttered agaisnt Dib's chest, and he held the other boy close. They stood in an embrace for a moment, before Dib swooped his head down, gently pressing his lips to Zim's.

"Let's go..." Both boys muttered at the same time, grinning lazily.

The walk to Zim's house was suprisingly comfortable. They held hands on the walk, which felt amazing in Dib's hand. So small, and soft. His three fingers fit between Dib's pinky, ring, and middle finger, allowing his thumb to hold and softly stroke all of Zim's hand. Zim goose-stepped up the walkway, flinging open the door to reveal Gir with his hood flipped down. He was holding half knitted baby booties and rolls of yarn strung throught the house.  
"Bigheadededededed Boy! Do you need anything, Mistress?" GIR cried happily, attaching himself to the shocked Dib's leg, the glaring up at him with Duty Mode red eyes.

"Err, no... and you can just call me Dib, GIR." Dib stated, patting the little robot on the head.

"Okie Dokie!" GIR grinned happily.

"Urgh!" ZIm had become tangled in light yellow yarn, causing both Dib and GIR to giggle.

"Awww, it likes youuuu." He sang, and Din crotched down to untangle the strings from around Zim's leg.

"Thank you." Zim mumbled quietly, leaning down. GIR body slammed into Zim's ass, forcing him to fall onto Dib and knock them onto the area rug. GIR squealed and skipped off, muttering things about 'pretty smelly paint' and 'nursery'. Dib grinned lightly, wrapping his arms around Zim's waist, and kissing him lightly.

"Computer! Take us to my room." Zim commanded.

The area rug suddenly dropped down, flying to the left, and flipping upside down. The boys landed with an 'Oomph' on the bed, huffing into each others mouths. Dib's clothes came off first and quickly, but before he could protest, Zim was raking a claw over his lips.

"I figured you want to get an undistracted view of my ehem, ijunk/i." Zim smirked and pulled off his shirt, 'no nipples' Dib noted. He then stood on the bed, which Dib realized was like a water bed, and slid off his skin tight black pants.

Dib blinked twice, but was generally unsuprised. Zim had a penis, but no testicles. Which made sense to Dib, since Irkens had no need for them, thier offspring produced by machines. Dib chomped on his lip, grinning at how perfect this was working out. Zim grinned, and turned around, bending over and shaking his ass a Dib... Well, lack of one. His butt was round, but didn't have cheeks, simply a tantilizingly puckered hole, that was being waved back and forth infront of his face. Dib growled loudly at the tease, snatching his loves hips and pulling himself up onto his knees.

"This might hurt... I should probably prep you..." Dib muttered, mouth watering a little. Zim laughed huskily and pushed back toward Dib again. Dib shrugged and thrust himself into Zim quickly, gasping loudly. Zim's hole was just like a condom that was a size too small. It streched perfectly, but was very tight around Dib.

"Ziiim." Dib stated, leaning forward lightly, then arching his back and continuing his thrusting. They both came quickly, words unnecassary. Dib notes that Zim's cum is more like a woman's, because of the lack of semen itself.

"I love you, my mate." They snuggle close, nuzzling each other and kissing lightly before falling asleep.

Dib awoke to a light pressure on his chest. He looked to his left and took the glasses his boyfriend were offering him, noticing that his neck was wet and throbbing. Zim must've been trying to wake him up by assulting his neck... explains the hard on. He then noticed that Zim was biting on a knuckle, holding in laughter. It was then Dib remembered the weight on his chest. He looked down to see the back of Gir, who quickly turned his head.  
"Eh, Dibbeh... is your weewee broken? 'Cause its all bent funny, and if I pokes it, it wiggles like a gettin' burnt wormy in the sun." The robots eyes were wide, and Dib blushes a scarlet that countered Zim's eyes. "Uhm, well you see Gir... I uh... I'd really, really, like some waffles." Gir shot to his stubby little feet, and ran off.  
"I LOVE WAFFLES!" He shouted, giggling. Zim removed his knuckle, holding back his laughter with a bad case of the shakes.  
"Need me to fix your pee-pee, Dibbles?" He asked slyly,'causing Dib to groan and flop back agaisnt the bed.


End file.
